HR – How I do a Job ? 😄

Salary Negotiation

salarynegotiation I confess that I lack that soft skill of salary negotiation 😟. After passing multiple stages of interviews, when a candidate has lost almost his self-respect to prove his worth, 🥺 the negotiation phase arrives. I hardly bargain while purchasing so Negotiation is a hard job 😤 for me.

While purchase, I understand the seller keeps some margin of benefit for himself, so I should not ask much less price to him. He also has to earn bread and butter😮 and even the seller allows us to purchase at much lesser prices. But in Corporate World, it is the Seller’s market. 😎 The employer has a lot of candidates in a pool and a plethora of talent available. I saw one ad offering 0.06 cents per word 🧐 and many have applied. Nothing to amaze, now in a few countries Oil is than water! 😐

HR practitioners seem to have a background in Vegetables wholesale market 🍆. Many companies ask about salaries of past, current, and expected. HR officials might be running their side hustle of providing data to marketing companies 😎. When a candidate has passed the required exams and interviews as per job requirements, offer him/her salary package as per the company pay scale.💰 Salary negotiation proofs that the company has weak Standards of operations (SOPs) and do not have a standard set of policies and procedures in place or the company is also suffering in covid days.

Yes, it is the universal truth that Salary packages are biased because of many reasons. In many countries, women🤵‍♀️ are paid less than men but I do not believe 🤥 that they are promoted during their probation period. Nepotism is cancer 🦀 in any industry and indirectly affects Employees’ productivity.

Sadly, It is been observed that Internationally Salary is offered based on passport colour (Nationality).🏞️ This is a reason that many Asians tend to obtain the nationality of western & European countries and prefer to work in the Middle East to earn luxury life. Their brown 🤎 and yellow 💛 race peers, (who have only one native nationality) jealous of them because they do the same job but with less money 💸. Thanks to God that nature distributed all human parts (heart, kidney, liver, and …🤔) equally to all mankind without any discrimination. 🙏

Interviews

Interviews are conducted to judge the skills, experience, and attitude of the candidates for a possible opportunity. Since my childhood, I have found to be more slavery mindset 😵. So, Taken Interviews are my basic instinct. It is obvious that the result of my Interviews matches with yours; mostly unsuccessful 😭. The rate of unsuccessfulness varies from person to person, but I never met any champion 🏆 who says his/her most of the Interviews are successful and got the job offer. Those statistics prove that Interviewer is smarter 😼 than you and asks the question that you do not know or could not answer in the way that intelligent interviewer was expecting from you.

After your successful hiring, When you came to know about the skills and qualities of the interviewer, you seriously start thinking about taking anger management 😠 classes. Nobody fights with the King of Jungle (Human Resources). HR Department is very supportive but at some points, they act very weird and their suspicious looks create anxiety 😟.

Few following examples of my encounters with the HR Team. One Interviewer asked me how do you see myself after 5 Years ? 🤔. If I were such a visionary 👁️, why would I apply for a little pennies job in your company? I just need that job at this time to run my daily expenses. Another question asked, why should we hire you? 🧐 This is something the Interviewer has to evaluate; I have answered all your questions; If I fit in your company and culture, hire me. Or the other answer to this question would be because your existing staff is not much capable 🤏 and I would add value to your business which they are not putting efforts. It means produce enemies in form of peers before getting on board. One question that I hate very much is What are your weaknesses?🕺Why; you want to screw me for the rest of my life? All these questions are supposed to be evaluated by Interviewer.

The above-asked questions were somewhat related to work. But what If the Interviewer asks why did you wear that particular color 🎨 for the Management role. Is there a connection of color with the Job role? Why your hairs are struggling to migrate towards the West ⬅️, where some of the hairs’ bunch of rebellions still pointing towards the North ⬆️? I could never comb my hair perfectly because of too silky and allergic to Gel 👶. Even on my wedding day, I was so embarrassed because of the over usage of gel application on my hair.

But HR is also a victim department. Nowadays HR is struggling to find competitive staff for their organizations. It is hard for them to hire the right candidate in 3-5 Interviews even. This is the reason most people get the job from references than the traditional job hiring process. So be social 🤝, meet the people even if you do not like them, praise them and sell your skills.🙏